Studies show that men are biased in favor of women (Goodwin 2004). Some people will suggest that this is genetic, that men evolved to put women first since they’re the ones who have babies and take care of them. But the truth is, there are multiple cultural things happening, cultural perceptions that are, of course, related to biology (culture and genes work together to influence our behavior).
Sex: Are boys biased in favor of girls before the boys hit puberty? I remember life as a child very well, and I’d have to say no. Boys are just as much biased toward their own group as grown women are biased toward themselves. It is only around puberty, when our female peers start developing into women, that this bias starts to break down among guys. Men go from “I hate girls, they’re gross” to “I gotta get laid, I gotta get laid. If I do this, maybe I’ll get laid. If I do that, maybe I’ll get laid.” I’ve certainly seen men danseling women in hopes that they might get laid, and I know women are aware that men will do it for that reason. Men reach their sexual peak at 17, which might influence their change of behavior in being biased toward women, but this cultural norm remains long after men pass their sexual peak, leaving men unaware that they don’t really need pussy all that bad. Blogger typhonblue has argued something similar to this, in her video “power of a limb dick”, where she basically says that men have diluted themselves into thinking that they desire women for their vaginas, but in actually, men, belonging to a social species, desire intimacy with a human being. Nonetheless, as far as I’m concerned, the sexual desires of young men turning women into trophies is a biological phenomenon that creates a cultural phenomenon, where even gay men who are contemptuous of straight men might treat women as trophies to be won.
Neoteny: This is a concept that youtuber girlwriteswhat discusses. Women retain childlike features in adulthood (big eyes, small chin, small bodies, high pitched voices) which makes people want to protect and care for them the way people do for actual children. This would be a strong indication of a biological component, that our genes trigger our brains to protect and care for people with neotenous features, and are therefore biologically predisposed to care for and protect women. The problem with that idea is the assumption that caring for children is biological. And yet, there have been plenty of cultures that care very little for children. Think of the book of Joshua in the Bible, where God orders the Hebrews not to spare any women or children when they invade Canaan. This bothers people in the modern world because we have different CULTURAL attitudes about children and women than the authors of the bible did. So Neoteny might explain the biological connection between women and children, but it doesn’t provide a biological explanation for the BIAS men have toward women, since the desire to spare women and children in war seems to be a cultural phenomenon. In today’s society, people care for children because of a conscious understanding that children are the future. This may lead to empathy toward anyone, not just children, who display neotenous features, which includes women and animals.
Women’s empathy: Another youtuber named pwnyslaystation01 mentioned a study (Viren Swami 2012) that found that people were less likely to identify troubled men as having a mental health disorder than they were a troubled woman. But the real interesting part of this study showed that women were more likely than men to identify the troubled man as having mental health problems, which suggests that women might have more empathy for men than men themselves do. This is in spite of the fact that men are less neotenous than women are. What effect does this have on men? It may cause men to be more guarded when around other men, but more open about their own feelings when they are around women. Norah Vincent, who disguised herself as a man, found out that men became more open around her after she revealed that she was really a woman. This may also lead to a self-perpetuating cycle of hostility between men. If you’re a man, and you see a woman and another man standing in front of you, and the woman has more empathy for you than the man does, you’ll be biased in her favor. But here’s the kicker, the other man will sense your hostility toward him, and he’ll sense the empathy in the girl, and he’ll also be biased in her favor. Do you see how this works? This also explains CreepyBitterGirl, a female feminist activist discussed by youtuber MykeruMedia. CreepyBitterGirl put together an army of male feminist mooks and had them vandalize men’s rights flyers in Vancouver BC. If my empathy theory is correct, it essentially means that feminist men who hate their own gender are responsible for all the things they hate about their own gender, because it’s their self-hatred that makes men hostile in the first place.
We don’t need to explain why women are biased toward their own gender. Humans are naturally biased toward their own group. When they’re not, it’s because something else prevents them from doing so. For men, we see at least three things: women’s empathy, men’s young sexual peak, and women’s neoteny are biological components intimately connected to cultural components, either causing them, or caused by them. These three things might influence individual men equally, or possibly disproportionately. For example, some men might just be trying to mate with girls, and so they white knight themselves in hopes of winning the trophy. Other men just see women as helpless creatures that need their protection because they see the similarities between women and children, and they already have cultural beliefs about children needing special protection. But most importantly, men look in the mirror and they see a creature lacking both neoteny and emphathy, and so continues the cycle of self hatred.
What effect does this have on women? Do they feel drained by men desiring love, empathy, and sex from them? Does it cause them to become callused toward men, to use them as tools for their own benefit? As humans, women are complex. There are hardwired parts in their minds and there are life experiences that shape their attitudes about men. The inability of men to empathize with each other leaves them vulnerable to women. Women being exposed to this vulnerability may grow callused over time, especially since the sexual elements of a woman’s mind might feel disgusted with a man’s vulnerabilities (she desires men to be completely manly inside and out).
These are issues that men need to talk about. It’s for their own good.